i have established a new comfort zone, miles away from the one i knew for eighteen years of my life and get this- i am happy and i love my life. i love my friends, my job, surfing, the simplicity of an island, and what i am studying. it feels right and it feels good. i have never understood math, or science, language learning, or history and the technicalities of english through me for a loop. but this whole "hippy-save-the-world-peacebuilding" thing makes sense and i get it. i wish everyone could. i am not smoking pot, i don't have dreads, and i don't believe in free love. maybe hawaii has changed me but that isn't a bad thing. i am not as naive as i once was and i know i have made decisions that i shouldn't have but, i am still conservative, i still go to church, have a testimony, and i still desire to settle down and have a family. i am still mckenzie.
i have dreams of living outside of mediocrity and i will make them happen. i know what i am doing and who i am but, i get lost and confused all the time. i am scared for the future, i make mistakes. i don't know exactly where i will end up or who i will become but i am taking things day by day, learning, and growing. the waves haven't stopped, but i have learned how to surf.
thank you for sharing this! I love the picture with the quote..... everyone needs to live by this!
ReplyDeletexxoo
chillsss again.
ReplyDeletethis whole "hippy-save-the-world-peacebuilding" thing i love that.
university of peace in costa rica? i think so.
Yay for almost being 20, once you hit 20, it really speeds up, so enjoy it :)
ReplyDeleteLove that quote! Happy Friday!!
Great blog!!
So much to say to your post.
ReplyDelete1. I love your blog. I may not have even commented before but I love it.
2. I love this post, a lot. And I will tell you why:
3. I went to BYU-H for my first semester of college. Totally one of those "term-ites" or at least that's what they called us back then :) Originally the only reason I came back to Provo was because 1. I got into BYU and 2. My friends were all here and it seemed so much more exciting than Hawaii. I know. I was crazy. Hawaii was beautiful but my friends were here at home and so was the boy I was dating at the time so I flew back. Disclaimer: I know my experience doesn't mean this goes for everyone, but I will tell you that if I could do it all over again, I would. 1. I never would have left Hawaii, or at least would have stayed there for another year or two. BYU is great in so many ways, but was not was I was hoping/looking for in a college experience. I went to high school about thirty minutes away so the whole "moving on/change" thing never really happened. And I regret that a lot. I also regret not applying to the U or taking my scholarship out at SVU. My parents were so set on me getting into BYU that I just went along with it. Four years later and I am now graduating in a major that I don't love as much as I'd hope, from a college where I felt like 95% of the students were some crazy group of people that I'd never relate to. That's awful. I know. And honestly, I ended up making the best of the situation and have best friends and amazing memories. But what I really wanted to say is:
3. It's so, so good to listen to your parents because they love you so much. And truth be told, they're probably right 97% of the time. But in my case, the 3% was when my parents wanted me to have an experience that they had in college - and I never had it. And I wish more than anything I would have done more of what I wanted to do. I have only a million wonderful things to say about my experience at BYU Hawaii and the diversity and the once in a lifetime experience. But anyway, I'm excited for you. For the life you get to live because you're living it! Not anyone else! Like you said, "The waves haven't stopped, but i have learned how to surf." So awesome.
thank you so much for your comment. you are too kind and have such great words of advice!! how do i get to your blog? i would love to check it out.
Deletelove this - thanks for sharing. sometimes its hard to realize in a hard moment but its true, we cant stop the negative things that happen but we can choose not to be effected by them. my mom always taught that "happiness is a choice" and i am so grateful for that!
ReplyDeletei love this mckenzie. walk your OWN path. that is all that matters. you are happy, keep being happy for YOU and not for anyone else. you are a great, wonderful, smart, spiritual girl and have a lot goin for you. you can make a difference and will. my sis graduated in peace building/ICS and i LOVE that major. amazing things. and people in that field will make a difference in this world. i have seen my sister do it time and time again since she has graduated and even before. happy for you and this fun time in your life. enjoy it and keep being amazing! being happy is not about having money and fitting a stereotype, ewww. plus who wants to live in provo ;) glad you have changed your ways! wooo for surfing!!
ReplyDeleteI love this. :) Good for you Mckenzie. You've got to do what makes you happy, even if others don't understand it. Hawaii has to be an AMAZING place to live!
ReplyDeleteno matter where you are or what you're doing the most important thing is to maintain a relationship with the lord and continue going to church. you are obviously an outstanding daughter of god and in the end that is all that will really matter. that is where true happiness lies. i think you are a wonderful person mckezie and i'm so grateful for this post.
ReplyDeleteIf you do what God created your spirit to do...you'll always be happy.
ReplyDeleteI love this and I love that you are doing what you love despite what everyone else did or is doing. Your mentality on life is the best. :] I hope you always have all the happiness that you deserve.
ReplyDeleteLove you Mckenzie!
ReplyDeleteI LOVE this post! You're so right. It's so much better to remember this than to forget to be awesome. LOVE your blog!! Newest reader :)
ReplyDeleteI am going to give you some advice that I sincerely wish that someone had given me when I was your age: It is YOUR life, do what is best for YOU. I spent a lot of time trying to please my family and I wasted years being unhappy because of it. I can be really hard because you want your family to love you but in the end you need to do the things that are going to make you most happy. Like you said, you aren't doing anything bad. Family should love you no matter what you do.
ReplyDeleteMy dad doesn't really agree with a lot of things that I've done in my life. It's hard and it hurts sometimes because I know that that's hurt our relationship. But I'd rather live the life that I need to live, you know?
Anyway... I just wanted to tell you that you aren't alone in the way you feel and it sounds like you're strong enough to make choices that are good for you. Keep it up lady!
P.S. I'm hosting a Shabby Apple giveaway, come enter!
this is rad. i love this.
ReplyDeletesooo good kenzie! i feel the exact same way, i thought i was reading out of my own journal! (besides the whole utah thing :) )
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